Mind Control

My new personal hero is Darren Brown. He has a show on the Sci Fi Channel called Mind Control. He's done some of the coolest things i've ever seen and I want to be just like him when i grow up. He knows so much about the human mind he can make someone think their car is a different color. Play tick tack toe - blind folded and win. Know when someone is lying, and subliminally hypnotize them and make them not be able to walk. He doesn't just do things himself but teaches other people to do things as well. He taught this girl to play the piano in a week without playing on one who then played a concert in front of hundreds of people.

My favorite thing so far was last night. He got this lady and kinda told her all this random stuff that must have been subliminal programming and then told her to walk across the room and stop at a random point. He wasn't watching but when he made a motion with his hand - she stopped. THen he had her do it again and told her to walk across the whole room without stopping but when she got to the same spot as before, she stopped anyways and wasn't able to move. She said it felt like her feet were stuck to the ground.. They were both on a second story window looking down at people walking along the street. He told her to pick a random person out and that she was going to be able to make them stop. She couldn' do it the first time but the second time she tried she could. She held her hand out with an open fist and said "1 2 3 STOP" and the person she was trying to make stop, STOPED and then she said "Turn around" and the woman on the street tured around and looked her straight in the eye, and then kept going... The woman couldn't have heard her, and was completely unaware that they were up there watching her - at least consiously -I was like WTF. How does that happen? The camera crew ran down to ask the lady why she stopped and she said she had an intense feeling like she forgot something but couldn't figure out what it was... wooooow Like I said he's my new personal hero. I need him to do some programming on me!

The next thing he did was to try to get someone to dream a particular thing subliminally. He played music and flashed a barrage of images for the guy right before he went to bed. Then when he was sleeping he played the same music and woke him up. The guy dreamed about the exact same things that Darren had written above his bed that corresponed to the subliminal images and music.. Then, and this would TOTALLY freak me out. HE had a seperate room set up next to the room the guy was sleeping in. When he fell asleep again he moved the wall and woke him up. The room was set up like a dream and had the same things he was dreaming about before. Sheep, grass, and old lady in a hostipal... and when the guy woke up he still thought he was dreaming!! WTTFF I dont know if that would work on me, but damn can you imagine waking up and someone changing the room you were sleeping in to look all crazy!? He even had umpa loopas there. I have no idea what I would do if i woke up and there were umpa loopas there!?!

So before I went to bed I wanted to see if I could do something like that. I wrote down what I wanted to dream about in hopes I would. I was also thinking about what I DIDNT want to dream about too. Stuff that was bothering me.

I didn't dream about what I wanted, but exactly and utterly what I didn't want to. Dreams are a way to confront issues you have in your mind. The scenario that was really bothering me wasn't just present in my dream, but blown up in my face in the worse possible scenario there could be! Great job unconsiouss Derek! and although I thought I didn't want to dream about what I did, I am SO glad I did. It's like having a fear of falling, and then in your dream you go sky diving 100 times. It's also very funny to me that I use people from reality tv shows to play the characters in my dream! There is like one person from my real life, and everyone else is from a reality tv show just playing the characters in my horrible little play hahahaha. And I even realized it in my dream at the time, but ignored it. I was like - well shit this couldnt' be.

So when I woke up, my fear was gone. I confronted it, it was real enough in my dream to make me realize what I needed to but in the worst possible - yet dream't - way. So now if and when the scenario happens in it's own way, it couldn't be worse than what I already went through in my dream and ill be like - been there, done that. wooo hoo

Sometimes you conveniently forget the bad as much as you forget the good. Sometimes you focus on only the good things in a person - and sometimes only the bad. Sometimes you forget who a person really is by only seeing the parts you want to see at the time. But if my dream was any indication about how i really feel about people - and looking back with an unbaised mind - wow. The gap between the goodness and the badness in someone shouldnt be so wide. and until I find someone that's not so back and forth, i'm definitely better off alone and dealing with dreams instead of real life people. And even if it's JUST me, which is totally possible, then the same thing applies. I need someone to go back and forth with me, not against me! Swimming together, not away from each other or bumping into each other. I think I need another pisces.

I've also started reading some really old books and it's really affecting my thinking and writing. I'm like all - thee, and thou. What tis this or that? I'm so damn impressionable. But anyways, yesterday was a reallly rough day for me, I can only put stuff off in my mind for so long before it all comes crashing in, but the advantage is that you get over it faster that way. One really really bad day is better than a really bad month. Everything is a process. A personal realization is like writing a book. You dont finish instantly, it takes you a lot of work to get to the end - You can write a lot in a little bit of time, or a little bit in a lot -which sometimes is missleading.

Is it really over? Or do i have to re-write it? How many times? But, and this is a big BUT. Unlike my book, the rest is all in my mind. I'm done when I say i'm done. And i'm so, so done. Well almost. This DB isn't quite Darren Brown - yet!


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