Bully Back Bitch!




So I was just shampooing the carpet and for some particular reason I started to think about bullying. I was remembering all the times I was harassed and made fun of and how damaged and scared I am.

Those damn kids! How can they be so cruel! What's wrong with them! What is the world coming to!!!!!!

And then a few moments later I got up from being curled up in a ball on the damp (but fresh) carpet and started to actually try and remember the times I was actually bullied. 

I could only think of maybe, two, or five. If you divide that between 27 years.. well, I guess I was bullied, not bullyed

I remembered this time in 3rd grade when this group of meanies - led by Roberto! (I actually remembered his name) would wait until snack, right outside the classroom door, and chase me! I don't remember why it started, or if it happened hundreds of times or just once. But I do remember telling the teacher and she said "You have to .. blah blah" 

What? YOU aren't going to make them stop? Isn't that your job?! I don't come to school to be chased! I come to learn!

The next thing I knew I was creeping out the door only to find them waiting to attack! Run! I made it to the grass when something rather strange happened. I stopped -  turned around -stood my ground and chased back! They ran. They never dared chase me again!

Victory!

The Fast forward to 7th grade has no major incidents. That was until this guy,who we shall also call Roberto! Did pretty much the same thing the evil 3rd graders did - but this time he was alone. I would be walking home, and he would yell and taunt me. What did he say? I dont remember. I know I didn't do anything to deserve it though. One time, also the last time, I took his taunt seriously - that same semi rage and defiance came over me, I threw my back pack down and yelled "lets go! Lets go!!! and ran up to him" The same thing happened that happened the first time - it never happened again. 

Those were the extents of my near physical altercations/ bullying. 

The other type of bullying - where someone makes fun of you: that whole "Sticks and stones" thing, well yeah, of course some people throughout my life have said some less than praiseworthy things to me. But even those can be counted on a couple hands. 

It didn't hurt that I really, didn't have anything to make fun of. I can't imagine what it would be like to have big ears, or to be really fat, or tall, or short, or a minority, or have a big nose, or being poor - or.. well anything like that. I  don't, or at least didn't have anything physically about me that anyone could make fun of. Actually it was probably more the opposite. I was tall and built enough that no one would try and fight me - not to mention that I would never do anything to start one. The only thing that might have illicit-ed some snide or silly comments was that I wasn't into the things that boys are supposed to. But I was starting to grow up in an age where those traditions were changing. Boys can do the things girls do now. And girls can do the things boys do. So it wasn't as bad as it was for people growing up before me. I also didn't socialize with anyone and always kept to myself. It's hard to be made fun of when you don't interact. 

So I developed a inferiority complex all by myself! I automatically assumed that I was a dork, or "un-cool" and it was that people didn't come running up to me and tell me how cool I was or ask to be my friend that affected me most. I have never initiated a friendship in my entire life - barely even a conversation with anyone. I didn't realize until after college that it was a two way street - that you have to encourage or even dare I say - attempt to be someone's friend. 

I dont know how it was in your High School, but in mine I don't remember bullying being a problem. Lake Forest is nessled between Mission Viejo and Irvine. Mission Viejo was placed as the #ONE safest city in the UNITED STATES. IRVINE is #4, and Lake Forest just went down to #7. Which means that I live in possibly the safest place in the entire world. That means there are no gangs. There's not really any crime. Kids can walk home - alone, from grade school! I mean seriously  I see tons of kids that look like they are 3 walking home  from school BY THEMSELVES. And Lake Forest Isn't a "Small town" It's one of the most populated cities in Orange County and borders the widest freeway.

If someone got in a fight or brought drugs to school, or a weapon - or even cheated on a test let alone bullied someone, they would get expelled for that shit! 

So anyways I guess cleaning the carpet helped to clean my mind from this whole being "bullied" thing. All in all I have to say that the majority of  people have been nice and kind and caring. Kids don't always know that their words might hurt someone else, they are legitimately ignorant. If they see someone being made fun of - they'll follow suite, not because they are mean, but because they don't want to be made fun of themselves. 

I've found it to be no small use, as you have read, to stand your ground. This also applies to standing up for other people. You can become even more powerful than the bullies by helping the bullied and forming a gang of do-gooders, and bully back! 

If that doesn't work there is absolutely no shame in telling your Mom, cause she'll kick their ass. Mine would! 

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